Last night was r-e-a-l-l-y bad


I don’t have time to go into it too much right now (I will after the weekend is over) but last night I ended up in the fetal position on the bathroom floor with a bipolar freak out, a full-out panic attack to the point of almost passing out from hyperventilating and DID flashbacks with everything in-between. I couldn’t tell my husband because he had a lot of serious responsibilities to handle today so  I didn’t want to lay that on him. It was…very bad.

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About CimmarianInk

Abuse Survivor Diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder PTSD and Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) also known as Multiple Personalities
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3 Responses to Last night was r-e-a-l-l-y bad

  1. castorgirl says:

    I’m so sorry…

    I know this is viewing it simplistically… but, you’re supporting your husband with his responsibilities, right? You’re doing what you can to help him out? So, why don’t you give him the chance to do the same for you?

    As for the hyperventilation… have you been through breathing exercises with your therapist? Many survivors have what is called hyperventilation syndrome, where the constant stress levels over time have meant that our breathing pattern has changed to being rapid and shallow. My first therapist noticed that my breathing was like this, and gave me a book and some exercises to do as a way of changing my pattern of breathing back to healthier breathing. A therapist later on showed me how to slow my breathing during a panic attack. You may already have these skills, but thought I’d mention it just in case.

    Again, I’m so sorry… I know how awful it can be when you’re curled up and the world is spinning and the flashback is sucking you into it’s own form of hell.

    I hope the rest of the weekend goes better for you…
    Sending lots of positive thoughts,
    CG

    • CimmerianInk says:

      I know what you mean. It’s simple and not so simple right? I did end up telling him after his own stress was over. As for the breathing I don’t really have any techniques, I just ended up sitting on the floor telling myself ‘This is a panic attack, you really can breath it just feels like you can’t’. It eventually worked but it was scary for a while there. You of course know what I mean.

      • castorgirl says:

        Oh yeah, I know I simplified it greatly…

        I’d highly recommend looking into breathing exercises of some sort – yoga, mindful breathing… whatever you feel comfortable with 🙂

        Take care,
        CG

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