Can there be more than one child alter?


Kind of a random thought. I’ve been wondering if I may have more than one child alter. My therapist has met the 8 year-old who seems to hold the fear but I wonder if there’s another child alter, the one who likes to color? It just seems to me that they may be different parts. I’m not sure why I feel that way it just seems right I guess? Can you have an alter that doesn’t hold or embody some kind of strong emotion? Can there be one who just wants to play? What would be the purpose in that?

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About CimmarianInk

Abuse Survivor Diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder PTSD and Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) also known as Multiple Personalities
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11 Responses to Can there be more than one child alter?

  1. roseroars says:

    Yes. I mean, like totally yes. Super-gnarly yes. Yes with sprinkles. Yes with a side of yes. Yes and then some. Like, tubular yes.

    Lisa

    • CimmerianInk says:

      Wow, I’m thinking you mean “yes” huh? lol!
      Can you elaborate? Why would that alter exist and what purpose does it serve to have a child alter who only wants to play? What’s the point?

      Of course I don’t know if there is another child alter, I’m just wondering because something feels different but I’m not sure what I’m feeling. I’ll have to talk to my therapist about it next week. Any information you have now would be helpful though in the meantime.

    • meredith says:

      Like, TOTALLY.

  2. Paul says:

    Yes, and it’s really common. Parts who play generally have been spared the effects of abuse. Generally, the dissociatives I know have a lot of child parts.

    • CimmerianInk says:

      Hi Paul!
      I’ve “seen” you on CG’s blog and it’s great to see you here.
      Thank you for your comment, I wonder where those parts come from, what I mean is how were they spared the abuse? What does that mean? Is it possible that I could feel so-to-speak the presence of another alter before they’ve presented in therapy? The other people that you know with multiple child parts, what do these other parts do, what’s their function? I know that’s a hundred questions, if you have any posts in which you’ve already addressed these questions feel free to shrare. Thank you again 🙂

  3. meredith says:

    Think of it this way, CI: all of it is you. Hopefully, not every, single moment of your life was hideous. The mundane, wonderful memories of playing with crayons tend to collect in pockets the same way ugly memories do. Your mind developed under the guidelines for having more than one personality, due to need. So, it did that.

    My Kidlets were MANY, in the beginning… I remember the brother and sister who took great care of one another. The sister was bubbly, charming, funny, and a delightful, magical child with great creativity. (She LOVED coloring, and always begged her mother for the 64 color version.) She could inspire people, both within and without, to believe, to laugh… she was hope for many of the Others. And her brother always made sure she went away when bad things happened. Even though she had a basic understanding of the life We had, Others took the trauma, and she remained intact. They needed for her to be intact. They needed her bubble of joy so that they wouldn’t lose hope. She inspired them, they protected her.

    I don’t know, exactly, the way in which memories cluster together, but my experience is that my mind did not discriminate when it came to splitting. It was so natural that I had happy parts, intelligent parts, Goth parts… and because my mind started going different directions so early in life, splitting was a natural response to many kinds of experiences, not just traumatic ones. I REALLY did not know how to think with my whole mind, at once. If the wrong personality took a test in school, I failed it. Given the test again, everyone would shove the right personality to the fore, and I’d ace it. I didn’t know any other way to think, so I am of many, many ages, races, identities… depending on what it was that most resonated with me at a particular time in my life.

    SO. It is very possible, even normal, that a personality may have developed because something within you turned to the pleasure of the memory–with the CI that was part of that memory–and the isolation of that memory developed more and more, each time it surfaced.

    My Little had a very developed personality for being only four… but she really wasn’t just four, because she was ME. She collected information that pleased and interested her throughout my growing years, but she was also timeless. She stopped at four because life was so out of control during the first five years, she couldn’t go farther than four and still be her Self. She thought like a child. And, she stopped aging when she realized she didn’t have a mother, so Others came into play who were older, wiser, and could read, write, give birth, etc. She didn’t I had children, for example. It didn’t matter to her, or to her world, and she couldn’t have taken care of them. So, compensation came to the rescue–other Others.

    Interestingly, she was the first to integrate. She was just gone, one day… and We cried. But, her work was finished, and I guess I must have known, somewhere, that I was going to be able to go forward on my/ our own. *sigh* She knew the funniest elephant jokes.

    If none of this rant makes sense, just flush it. Your last post talked a lot about your Grandmother, and the grief that you are now, finally, beginning to work through. Maybe the Little who loves to color has surfaced to help you process the work you are now doing. That happened for me.

    I was glad you posted about your grandmother. I wish you sunbeams in that house that was once your respite.

    ~meredith~

    • CimmerianInk says:

      Wow. Your post made so much sense so no worries there. I had never considered that happy parts could be involved as well. I assumed that every personality had to be based on the abuse but I couldn’t figure out this other impression. Very interesting to the newbie here 🙂 Your explanation was brilliant by the way and stated perfectly! You relaying your personal experience was very helpful so thank you for that.

  4. castorgirl says:

    One day I shall inflict the overwhelming happiness and playfulness of Aimee on you 🙂 Be afraid… very afraid 🙂

    I agree with what everyone else has said… parts were created for different roles, functions, needs etc. Remember that the main motivation for dissociation is to keep you safe. Part of keeping safe, is to keep up the appearance of you being a happy child who will play and have fun.

    Take care,
    CG

    • CimmerianInk says:

      Hmmm…interesting point. So do you think that a person with a child alter who basically just plays was a “front” so-to-speak, used to make others think that everything was ok?

      • meredith says:

        I don’t know about CG, but my happy kids were collections of happy moments I experienced, just like my gnarly kids were collections of gnarly moments I experienced. I think that DID is kind of like a habit we develop to keep things in order so we can survive. I had a part that only spoke French. I think it was because I had to focus so hard in class to get it right. And, of course, her name is/ was GiGi. She talks in my sleep, according to JJ (my mate).

        That’s just my take. Feeling conversational today, I guess. 🙂

        ~meredith~

      • castorgirl says:

        I can only say from my experiences, that this is what parts like Aimee were created for. Aimee played happily during breaks at school, so any teacher who was worried about me, would look at her behaviour and dismiss any concerns immediately. I appeared “normal” to the untrained eye.

        I know there are books about the different types of alters and their roles. Many of them mention alters who were there to protect by appearing happy and healthy – the librarian in me is screaming about generalising and not giving you titles, but I’m sure some of the books that were recommended to you awhile ago cover this. Their role of happiness is just as vital as those who took the abuse for you. Both were born to protect, just in different ways. Both need attention and healing, just in different ways.

        Take care,
        CG

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