Don’t know why I’m writing really. I just feel…disturbed, odd. Kind of like my mind is on the verge of something but maybe I’m just being silly or nervous. I’ve noticed that there is an internal fear from some younger part or parts in connection with the hospital. There seems to be a fear that if something bad is remembered we’ll end up back in the hospital again, almost a… backlash directed at me, the Host, a fear that I won’t be able to handle anything that might be seen because I handled it so badly the last time. I’m trying to reassure these parts that my therapist is no longer sick and is therefore available to talk to which is different from the last time. I don’t know what else to do to help internally. I’m not sure what to do to help myself with this vague, or not so vague feeling of unease either.
I wonder with the holiday coming up, will I be abandoned blogwise until the holidays are over? Oh well. *sigh* 🙂